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Female Narrator:
Previously on 'Forgive Me':
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Are you saying
repeat the treatment?
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00:00:05,827 --> 00:00:07,345
More aggressively.
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What if we don't?
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No growth.
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That's greats news!
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More chemo?
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No more chemo.
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Are you sure?
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I'm sure.
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Okay! Go to work!
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Everyone knows everyone else's
business, it's a small town.
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What are they saying?
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Why is it your business?
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I don't know.
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I didn't want to
tell her I was her father
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and then die
a week later.
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Maybe your daughter
is a reason to live.
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That letter's
almost 30 years old.
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It's to my mother.
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I think I should sue.
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Sue? The church?
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I don't want you to tell
anyone, about any of this.
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The lawsuit, the
letter, none of it.
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If your bosses see
the letter they're gonna--
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it's gonna give them
a chance to cover it up.
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They'll cover
it up more. They wouldn't.
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I don't think they
would cover this up.
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Genesius did.
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No, he didn't.
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Gene reported it.
He reported it.
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You can see that in
the letter that you have.
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Yeah, well he
didn't go to the police.
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No, but-- Hey,
this works both ways.
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Gene couldn't
go to the police
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with something that your mother
told him in confession. Alright?
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He couldn't,
just like right now.
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I can't go to the authorities,
I can't go to the higher ups
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with this plan of
yours to sue the church.
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You have my word, I will
not tell anybody. I can't.
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? 'Ave Maria' by
Christopher Frances Mitchell ?
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? 'Ave Maria' by
Christopher Frances Mitchell ?
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[suspenseful background music]
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[suspenseful background music]
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[suspenseful background music]
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[suspenseful background music]
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[suspenseful background music]
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[suspenseful background music]
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[suspenseful background music]
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[background music morphs
into heavy metal sounds]
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[background music morphs
into heavy metal sounds]
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Hello?
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Sister?
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[gasps] Ahh!
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Oh, fuck.
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Ahh.
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And if we had a little bit
of co-operation in this parish,
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then I wouldn't
have to ask for that.
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Morning.
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Morning.
Good morning.
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Where's Gene?
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He said something
about a lawyer.
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He went to a lawyer?
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Well, that's what he said.
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Why?
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Well, sometimes when a
family's has the same priest
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for lots of years, they ask
him to go see the executioner,
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that type of thing.
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Executor.
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Executor. Oh! [laughs]
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Well, both.
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Were you talking about me?
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Well, we thought Father Phil
might hear confessions today.
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Give you a rest.
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I don't need a break.
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You're taking on
a lot, really soon.
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It's been months. I'm good.
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Let him do it.
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Thank you.
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Remember when I
used to be in charge?
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Yeah, you gave him the
job, now let him do it.
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[sigh]
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[organ music plays loudly]
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[organ music plays loudly]
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[organ music plays loudly]
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[footsteps are
heard, door opens]
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Hey.
Hey.
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Do you want to start?
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Okay.
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Have you been to
confession before?
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Yeah. Yeah,
lots of times.
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So, you want to
ask for forgiveness?
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Wha, what is it ag--?
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It's: Forgive me
Father for I have sinned.
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[clears throat]... Forgive
me Father for I have sinned.
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How long has it been
since your last confession?
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Hard to say, really.
We had these group things.
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Kind of a
group forgiveness.
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Um, a general penance?
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Yeah, where we
all get forgiven.
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It's a, it's
kind of a new thing.
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We don't really do
it here 'cause we've got
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these great confession
booths and enough priests.
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But some people do prefer
it, to ask God forgiveness
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as a congregation.
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We were a mixed denomination
so that's all that would fly.
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Military?
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Army.
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How long since you've
been in a confession booth?
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Five, six years.
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I definitely confessed
right before I went over.
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I wanted a clean slate.
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Welcome back.
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Thanks.
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Whattaya got?
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I'm a bad person.
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God made you.
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You're a good person
who did some bad things,
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like everybody else.
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No, that's not me.
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You were at war.
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Do good
people go to war?
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I mean, sign
up to go fight?
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Do good Christians
enlist to fight?
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I mean, there's not
a dictate in the Bible
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about whether to serve.
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Paul describes a
Christian as a 'fellow soldier'
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and um, you know, Jesus healed
the servant of a centurion, so--
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So Jesus liked soldiers.
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Well, some...
soldiers crucified him.
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Right.
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I believe in the
basic goodness in people
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and I understand that
when you're in battle, in war,
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you have do things that
are less morally clear cut.
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Why are they less
morally clear cut?
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Because people are
trying to kill you?
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00:11:31,929 --> 00:11:38,171
Yeah, in their homes. On
their streets. Not mine.
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Tell me if I'm wrong on this
one, but when you're a soldier,
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right, you don't decide
where you're going to serve.
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You just go where
they tell you, right?
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You do what
they tell you to do.
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Or you go to jail.
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What, do you think that
makes you a bad person?
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I guess that's just, the
kind of thing you figure out.
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What's your name?
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Iggy.
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00:12:06,999 --> 00:12:12,240
Iggy. Iggy, do you
have a confession to make?
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00:12:13,929 --> 00:12:15,895
I hit my kid.
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Why?
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00:12:18,654 --> 00:12:22,068
The mayhem, the noise.
Sometimes I just can't take it.
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00:12:22,171 --> 00:12:24,964
Like um...
post-traumatic stress disor--?
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00:12:25,068 --> 00:12:28,206
No! I was a dick to my
kid before I went to war.
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Stop making
excuses for me!
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Jesus Christ, I told
you I'm a bad person!
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00:12:33,206 --> 00:12:36,240
So you just hit
your kid for being noisy?
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Yeah.
157
00:12:37,206 --> 00:12:38,964
Yeah, I mean
that's, that's a sin.
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00:12:39,068 --> 00:12:41,068
But it doesn't
make you a bad person.
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00:12:43,482 --> 00:12:48,964
There was a kid, a
bomber, thirteen years old,
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blew up a vest, took
out four British soldiers.
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Everybody was
talking about it.
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You know, word got around,
they're using little kids.
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Little kid
suicide bombers.
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So you keep your
eye out, you know,
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that's one thing, they have
success, they reproduce it.
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Instantly. They don't
give you time to learn.
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Just boom, boom, boom.
168
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Two or three days after that,
after the British soldiers
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got killed, I see a
kid, one of these kids,
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out of the
corner of my eye.
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00:13:17,206 --> 00:13:19,206
And they have these,
these loose outfits,
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you know, lots of
fabric but you can tell,
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from where I'm standing,
that she's loaded up.
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[coughs] She's puffed out
evenly; you know, chest, belly,
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00:13:29,068 --> 00:13:34,309
under her arms,
back, it's a vest.
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00:13:34,413 --> 00:13:37,826
And she's walking directly at
a group of soldiers, my friends,
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00:13:41,999 --> 00:13:45,033
and I'm like forty feet
away but it's like, seconds.
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And she's
stepping towards them.
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00:13:46,585 --> 00:13:49,171
If she detonates from where
she's standing, they're dead.
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00:13:49,275 --> 00:13:52,033
I can't yell out to her,
'cause all she's gotta do
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00:13:52,137 --> 00:13:57,033
is push a button or whatever,
when she's caught. So, I shoot.
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00:13:57,137 --> 00:14:08,171
And I hit her... and she
fell to the ground and bled out.
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00:14:08,275 --> 00:14:12,102
And was she?
Loaded up?
184
00:14:12,206 --> 00:14:15,999
It was food. She was
loaded up with food.
185
00:14:16,102 --> 00:14:17,516
She was hungry.
186
00:14:17,620 --> 00:14:19,551
Who knows who she
was trying to feed,
187
00:14:19,653 --> 00:14:23,516
she'd stolen a bunch of food,
strapped it around her body,
188
00:14:23,620 --> 00:14:25,791
under her robe, her skirt.
189
00:14:27,482 --> 00:14:30,688
I killed a little girl
'cause she was hungry.
190
00:14:30,791 --> 00:14:32,275
And what happened?
191
00:14:32,378 --> 00:14:33,722
That's it. She's
dead. She's dead.
192
00:14:33,826 --> 00:14:36,688
No, no, I just--
I mean... to you.
193
00:14:36,791 --> 00:14:41,378
What happened? Did they
investigate, were you punished?
194
00:14:41,482 --> 00:14:42,999
I walked away.
195
00:14:43,102 --> 00:14:46,033
Guys said they would've done
the same thing if it was them,
196
00:14:46,137 --> 00:14:47,999
thanked me for
looking out for them.
197
00:14:48,102 --> 00:14:50,171
That's it?
198
00:14:50,275 --> 00:14:53,619
Yup. I'm not paying
for it in this lifetime.
199
00:14:56,378 --> 00:14:59,551
But you expect to
pay for it in the next.
200
00:14:59,653 --> 00:15:01,240
It was a mistake.
201
00:15:01,344 --> 00:15:04,482
I shot a girl with a C-7 assault
rifle. It wasn't a mistake.
202
00:15:04,585 --> 00:15:06,826
I made a risk
assessment to protect my unit.
203
00:15:06,929 --> 00:15:09,240
If it was a mistake, there
would've been repercussions.
204
00:15:09,344 --> 00:15:13,171
Do they not try to, I don't
know, to negotiate with these,
205
00:15:13,275 --> 00:15:15,240
ah, these suicide
bombers, right?
206
00:15:15,344 --> 00:15:18,068
Can you get them
to take the vest off?
207
00:15:18,171 --> 00:15:21,447
I don't know, go for mental
health care, rehabilitation?
208
00:15:21,551 --> 00:15:24,171
There's no
rehabilitation. You kill them.
209
00:15:24,275 --> 00:15:26,516
Who's gonna
rehabilitate them?
210
00:15:26,619 --> 00:15:28,653
Their government?
211
00:15:28,757 --> 00:15:32,068
Their government isn't
gonna teach 'em not to hate us.
212
00:15:32,171 --> 00:15:35,068
Their government, our government
can't do shit, really.
213
00:15:35,171 --> 00:15:43,068
It's hard to hear
but... it's not surprising.
214
00:15:43,171 --> 00:15:46,516
I think we know by now
what goes on during war.
215
00:15:46,619 --> 00:15:51,275
Yeah, so how does
that work, then, sin-wise?
216
00:15:51,378 --> 00:15:54,413
There's no easy
answer for that.
217
00:15:54,516 --> 00:15:56,619
What does
the Bible say?
218
00:15:56,722 --> 00:15:58,413
Well, not to murder.
219
00:15:58,516 --> 00:16:00,206
After that it gets murky.
220
00:16:00,309 --> 00:16:03,206
The bible's murky?
221
00:16:03,309 --> 00:16:07,482
Alright, well if you
kill a thief in your home,
222
00:16:07,584 --> 00:16:10,137
you don't have to atone
by killing an animal, right?
223
00:16:10,240 --> 00:16:16,482
That much is clear but
that's-- it's Old Testament.
224
00:16:16,584 --> 00:16:21,309
Look, Jesus said,
'All who live by the sword
225
00:16:21,413 --> 00:16:23,309
shall die by the sword'.
226
00:16:23,413 --> 00:16:26,482
That's fairly easy to
extrapolate to a suicide bomber.
227
00:16:26,584 --> 00:16:29,688
If you put on the vest
you're gonna die either way.
228
00:16:32,860 --> 00:16:35,137
Humph, I signed
up to be there.
229
00:16:35,240 --> 00:16:37,206
I traveled halfway
'round the world.
230
00:16:37,309 --> 00:16:40,309
I had a gun, lots of
guns, with the intent to kill.
231
00:16:40,413 --> 00:16:42,757
And after all that I can
still claim self defense?
232
00:16:42,860 --> 00:16:45,344
It doesn't sound like
that's what you're saying.
233
00:16:45,447 --> 00:16:49,137
I left her on the
street, like garbage.
234
00:16:49,240 --> 00:16:52,137
She was
somebody else's kid.
235
00:16:52,240 --> 00:16:54,482
Now I come home
and hit my own kid.
236
00:16:54,584 --> 00:16:56,482
That's a bad person.
237
00:16:56,584 --> 00:17:00,206
Maybe being a good
person is like being religious.
238
00:17:00,309 --> 00:17:03,826
It's something you do.
239
00:17:03,929 --> 00:17:05,722
Like, personally, I
don't believe that people
240
00:17:05,826 --> 00:17:08,240
are good Christians
just because they say
241
00:17:08,344 --> 00:17:09,722
that they believe, okay?
242
00:17:09,826 --> 00:17:12,102
Religion is a practice.
243
00:17:14,240 --> 00:17:15,895
Just like
being a good person.
244
00:17:15,999 --> 00:17:17,481
Goodness isn't
something you are,
245
00:17:17,584 --> 00:17:19,722
it's something that
you do. You practice at it.
246
00:17:19,826 --> 00:17:24,481
You practice being good,
that's how you get to be good.
247
00:17:24,584 --> 00:17:26,550
Alright, a lot of
people hit their kids.
248
00:17:26,653 --> 00:17:30,206
You make your peace with
it and you don't do it again.
249
00:17:30,309 --> 00:17:34,481
What about
the other thing?
250
00:17:34,584 --> 00:17:36,309
Could be harder
to put behind you,
251
00:17:36,413 --> 00:17:39,653
but it's not something that
could ever happen to you here,
252
00:17:39,757 --> 00:17:42,206
in your real life. Right?
253
00:17:42,309 --> 00:17:47,206
I tell myself that but...
it's my life. All of it.
254
00:17:47,309 --> 00:17:51,550
But, I mean, you don't have to
worry about shooting somebody.
255
00:17:51,653 --> 00:17:53,895
Not in your home.
256
00:17:53,999 --> 00:17:56,481
Do you? You're not,
you're not talking about--
257
00:17:56,584 --> 00:17:58,964
I don't keep guns in
the house. Not with kids.
258
00:17:59,068 --> 00:18:01,999
See, that's great!
You're practicing already.
259
00:18:02,102 --> 00:18:04,275
You don't have to
make the same mistakes.
260
00:18:04,378 --> 00:18:06,999
I'm not
confessing my mistakes!
261
00:18:07,826 --> 00:18:10,378
I meant to
hit my kid!
262
00:18:10,481 --> 00:18:13,826
I meant to
kill that girl!
263
00:18:13,929 --> 00:18:17,791
There were things I did, on
my deployment that were sinful.
264
00:18:17,895 --> 00:18:21,275
They weren't errors
they were orders.
265
00:18:21,378 --> 00:18:23,964
Shooting at insurgents,
interrogating civilians--
266
00:18:24,068 --> 00:18:26,344
more than interrogating,
beating them, scaring them.
267
00:18:26,446 --> 00:18:28,826
It's not my mistakes
that make me a bad person!
268
00:18:28,929 --> 00:18:34,722
Does that mean you're
confessing these things, right?
269
00:18:34,826 --> 00:18:37,446
You obviously
feel bad about them.
270
00:18:37,550 --> 00:18:41,275
This sacrament
is about absolution.
271
00:18:41,378 --> 00:18:45,826
If there was ever a situation
where you can have a fresh start
272
00:18:45,929 --> 00:18:48,446
it's coming
home from war.
273
00:18:48,550 --> 00:18:50,964
Your sins don't
have to follow you.
274
00:18:51,068 --> 00:18:55,481
You didn't even
want to do them.
275
00:18:55,584 --> 00:18:58,757
You can leave
this all behind.
276
00:19:00,377 --> 00:19:02,688
You can start
right here, right now,
277
00:19:02,791 --> 00:19:06,688
today, in God's eyes,
through God's forgiveness.
278
00:19:06,791 --> 00:19:09,240
I'm not putting things
behind me, I'm going back.
279
00:19:12,377 --> 00:19:14,344
I redeploy
in eight weeks.
280
00:19:14,446 --> 00:19:15,550
You're going back.
281
00:19:15,653 --> 00:19:20,688
Yeah, not to the same place,
the same general... desert.
282
00:19:20,791 --> 00:19:23,343
Okay.
283
00:19:23,446 --> 00:19:26,860
I'm here to clean my slate
again, get forgiven my sins,
284
00:19:26,964 --> 00:19:29,895
before I go back, in case
I get my head blown off.
285
00:19:29,999 --> 00:19:33,515
Of course.
Duh. Sorry.
286
00:19:33,619 --> 00:19:35,343
That's okay, it
was nice to hear.
287
00:19:35,446 --> 00:19:38,033
I've got eight weeks at
home and then I ship out.
288
00:19:38,137 --> 00:19:41,515
That's a lot of time right,
to make it up to your kid?
289
00:19:41,619 --> 00:19:42,929
It's no time.
290
00:19:43,033 --> 00:19:45,791
Trust me, lots of people
only wish they had eight weeks
291
00:19:45,895 --> 00:19:46,895
with their father.
292
00:19:46,999 --> 00:19:50,343
I don't want them to
remember me just for that.
293
00:19:50,446 --> 00:19:51,653
They won't.
294
00:19:53,412 --> 00:19:56,033
You've gotta remember, right,
that this could be the last time
295
00:19:56,137 --> 00:19:57,688
that you have with them.
296
00:19:57,791 --> 00:19:59,895
I mean, if you get
your head blown off.
297
00:19:59,999 --> 00:20:03,999
Is that actually like--
is that a real possibility?
298
00:20:04,102 --> 00:20:05,688
[laughs]
299
00:20:05,791 --> 00:20:09,343
This one time, clearing
out of a village near Ghazni
300
00:20:09,446 --> 00:20:11,550
and this parade of Hajis
comes barreling into town,
301
00:20:11,653 --> 00:20:15,343
down the road, kicking up
dust, shooting launchers at us.
302
00:20:15,446 --> 00:20:16,999
Shooting at everybody.
303
00:20:17,102 --> 00:20:18,688
They didn't care
about collateral damage,
304
00:20:18,791 --> 00:20:20,722
they're doing
the death blossom.
305
00:20:20,826 --> 00:20:23,068
I got bullets
whizzing past my head.
306
00:20:23,171 --> 00:20:24,929
So I dive for
the closest cover.
307
00:20:25,033 --> 00:20:26,550
That's what
you do, right? Yeah.
308
00:20:26,653 --> 00:20:28,377
There I am, backed
up against crates
309
00:20:28,481 --> 00:20:31,068
that we were loading in
before all this was going on.
310
00:20:31,171 --> 00:20:33,343
Look over my
shoulder, that's when I see
311
00:20:33,446 --> 00:20:35,343
the print on the
side of the crate.
312
00:20:35,446 --> 00:20:40,515
I'm like, Jesus Christ, I'm
hiding behind 4 crates of ammo.
313
00:20:40,619 --> 00:20:45,343
Explosives...
Idiot! [laughs]
314
00:20:45,446 --> 00:20:49,722
So I'm pinned there and I gotta
get the hell outta there, right?
315
00:20:49,826 --> 00:20:53,895
I see my guys and I'm like
'Guys! Can somebody cover me?'
316
00:20:53,999 --> 00:20:56,343
They can't hear me
so I just start clawing
317
00:20:56,446 --> 00:20:59,964
at the wood, the side of
the crate, just praying.
318
00:21:00,068 --> 00:21:01,860
And I peel back a plank.
319
00:21:01,964 --> 00:21:05,929
Just one side of a plank and
I reach in, I'm like 'Please'.
320
00:21:06,033 --> 00:21:08,068
I pull out a grenade.
321
00:21:08,171 --> 00:21:09,929
I throw it,
just into the dirt,
322
00:21:10,033 --> 00:21:12,757
it goes up into a big
cloud of smoke, I run.
323
00:21:12,860 --> 00:21:15,412
Pow, the grenade gets
their attention, boom!
324
00:21:15,515 --> 00:21:21,412
They hit the crate. Fireworks,
fireballs, ignitables.
325
00:21:21,515 --> 00:21:24,068
Yeah man, I can
get my head blown off.
326
00:21:24,171 --> 00:21:28,584
Well, don't
forget about that.
327
00:21:28,688 --> 00:21:31,137
Be the man that you want
your children to remember.
328
00:21:37,550 --> 00:21:39,481
Anything else
you want to confess?
329
00:21:45,033 --> 00:21:46,653
'O King
enthroned on high,
330
00:21:46,757 --> 00:21:48,412
filling the
earth with your glory.
331
00:21:48,515 --> 00:21:50,929
Holy is your
name, Lord God Almighty.
332
00:21:51,033 --> 00:21:54,412
In our sinfulness we cry out
to you to take away our guilt,
333
00:21:54,515 --> 00:21:56,619
and to cleanse our
lips to speak your word,
334
00:21:56,722 --> 00:21:59,653
through Jesus Christ
our Lord.' Amen.
335
00:21:59,757 --> 00:22:01,999
Amen.
336
00:22:02,102 --> 00:22:04,171
Say ten Hail Marys.
337
00:22:04,274 --> 00:22:05,826
Ten Hail Marys?
338
00:22:05,929 --> 00:22:07,171
Yeah. Do you know it?
339
00:22:07,274 --> 00:22:10,068
Yeah, I know it.
340
00:22:10,170 --> 00:22:14,481
That's the life of a
little girl? Ten Hail Marys?
341
00:22:14,584 --> 00:22:16,481
That's the penance
that restores balance?
342
00:22:16,584 --> 00:22:18,137
No.
343
00:22:18,239 --> 00:22:22,068
Trust me, there aren't
enough Hail Marys in the world.
344
00:22:22,170 --> 00:22:24,826
That's not the point.
345
00:22:24,929 --> 00:22:26,826
I wish I
never went there.
346
00:22:26,929 --> 00:22:28,170
I know.
347
00:22:28,274 --> 00:22:33,205
What you said, earlier,
about seeking God's forgiveness,
348
00:22:33,308 --> 00:22:35,515
after the war's over.
349
00:22:35,619 --> 00:22:42,999
I'm gonna think about
that. When I'm over there.
350
00:22:43,102 --> 00:22:47,205
Goodbye Father... Goodbye.
351
00:22:58,033 --> 00:23:08,102
?
352
00:23:08,205 --> 00:23:28,101
?
353
00:23:28,205 --> 00:23:48,101
?
354
00:23:48,205 --> 00:24:07,619
?
355
00:24:07,722 --> 00:24:09,653
Narrator:
Next time on 'Forgive Me':
356
00:24:09,757 --> 00:24:12,999
[sobs]
357
00:24:15,653 --> 00:24:19,619
Um, this is
Bishop Belliveau-Brown.
358
00:24:19,722 --> 00:24:22,619
Yes, of course.
359
00:24:22,722 --> 00:24:24,722
It's about a
Jonathan O'Leary.
360
00:24:24,826 --> 00:24:27,619
You know who that is?
361
00:24:27,722 --> 00:24:30,722
His mother
told Gene about it.
362
00:24:30,826 --> 00:24:33,032
And Gene told you,
you covered it up.
363
00:24:33,136 --> 00:24:34,860
And how do
you know all this?
364
00:24:37,308 --> 00:24:38,895
They want
me to tell you;
365
00:24:38,999 --> 00:24:41,860
you can get more money
if you settle out of court.
366
00:24:41,964 --> 00:24:43,826
What do you think?
367
00:24:43,929 --> 00:24:46,584
Should I settle?
368
00:24:47,343 --> 00:24:51,688
You went into the archives
and you provided materials
369
00:24:51,791 --> 00:24:55,308
to someone you knew would
use them against the church.
370
00:24:55,358 --> 00:24:59,908
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